I’ve been faking it, stuffs been tough | 0104

Out here faith’ing and man it’s not so easy. Being strong or rather doing my best to seem strong and as if I have it all together, IT’S ALL BEEN FAKE! 😐

I’m falling apart. Actually, I’ve been falling apart and been trying to catch a piece of life as it falls out my hands but it slips out anyways and I’m just trying to sweep together that little piece which is now pieces together again.

So I needed to come clean.  I’m so teary, and in all this tears I’m crying out to Jesus, I need help. I can’t even figure out what and why I’m feeling all this feelings. I couldn’t pin it to one thing, and I really tried. Truth is, there is so much going and really Holy Spirit convicted me of this; Not giving it all to Him.

That truth hit me harder when I realised that I’m out here faking it all. I pretend I got it together. When I don’t. Let me be practical with you, I’ve been holding so many things against myself; such as not being able to push through a commitment I made in faith such as certain projects and set prayer times. Just sitting with my Jesus had become hard to do, and truly that’s all I yearn for. I literally become a ball of tears when I think of this.

I am probably just a weirdo and that’s okay. I am a weirdo for Jesus.

I am letting go and just letting God.

I have said this before, however, this time I mean it. Even if I have to keep saying it day by day, hour by hour, then I will.

Trusting God is the best and the hardest thing ever.

Here’s to starting over.

I trust that if you’re reading this that you too will let go and truly let God into your situation and most importantly remember to leave everything at His feet.

Have peace in knowing He will carry you through it all no matter.

A song that has been prominent lately in my life is by Steffany Gretzinger, No One Ever Cared for Me Like Jesus. I urge you to have a listen.

I mean He really didn’t and doesn’t need to but still He cares for you and me…Jesus is soo good. 🥹

May this bless you as you seek Him and grow closer to Jesus.

Dear Jesus,

Thank you, that it is You, Jesus, that holds everything together, You hold me together Jesus, thank You Jesus my Lord & Saviour. 🙌

Must reads;

📌Matthew 6

📌Psalms 23

Less focus on what God wants to do through me but rather on what God means to me. 💕

Jesus is Worthy.

Jesus is the Treasure.

❤️